Okay, so yesterday night I was sleeping over at Sarah's dad's house, and it's like a huge mansion thing it's so awesome, but anyway, I talked to Jordan. I asked him like why does he have to be so mad at me all the time, and he's like, "Well, I'm not really mad, it's just that it's really annoying when you say stuff that makes us all argue." and I was like, "Well, I don't mean to. I just don't like it when you're mad at me" and he's like, "Okay then, on Monday, let's just like, try to get along". And then I said some like 10 minute thing about how if I've been thinking about if I should make it be over, like us, and about how if it was over I wouldn't be able to talk to him again even if he wanted me to, but like now because it's not over yet I know I can phone him like any time I want even if he doesn't want me to, so like could he decide, because it wasn't that hard, and it's like how much time does he need, because if he did care then why couldn't he say it, because it's like he's said it before so why couldn't he say it now, and he might not be saying it because he didn't care, and if he didn't care then why couldn't he just say because then it would be over and we both wouldn't have to worry about it, and it's like it's not like very good like me not knowing whether he does or not.

And he said about Andrew when I said he was friends with Andrew, he's like, "Well yeah, sort of". And I was like, "Um I thought you guys were best friends," and he's like, "Well I'm actually better friends with Jonathan and Ben, but Andrew thinks we're like BEST friends." and I was like um oh my god but then I was like, "So if I asked you, like to call me sometime, would you do it?" and he was just totally like, "Yeah." and I just totally like whoa, because I like totally didn't think he would, so I said, "Because I like totally've been wanting to ask you to, but like I totally can't do it at school because then people would like KNOW, which I know you like totally don't want them to, which is like what it was like last week when Derek was asking me if I lived in a bumhouse, and then I said to ask you, but that was a really dumb thing to say because Derek doesn't know, and seeing as I said that now he might kinda know, which is like, bad, and, do you think I live in a bumhouse?" and he's like, "What?" and I was like, "Do you think I live in a bumhouse", because he's like totally seen my house, so he was like, "What, is that like a place for street bums and where they live?" and I'm like, "Yeah", and he's like, "Well, no, not really," and I was like ugh! not really? That is so messed up!

But then Sarah and Stephanie were trying to disconnect the phone, so I said to Jordan, "Okay, I'm gonna ask you to phone me tomorrow...are you going to?" and he's like, "Well, what time?" and I was like, "Well, I'm gonna be home all day, so whatever time is good for you," and he's like, "Well, I do have all those drafts to do, and so do you, and I might be going out, but I will try to call you tomorrow," and I was like, "Okay, so does that mean you DO care?" and then he's like, "Well, I don't totally NOT care," but then I said to him, "Okay, Stephanie and Sarah keep saying they're gonna unplug the phone, but I don't think they're gonna do it," and he's like, "I think they will" and then Stephanie did something that made the phone go all blowy staticy and freaked up, so I lost connection for like 2 minutes, but then it stopped, and I was like, "Um, did they..." and he was like, "Yeah, they did", in this totally 'I told you so' kind of voice which got me so mad. I started freaking and running around the house looking for Stephanie and Sarah because they disconnected us, and he said about how he would call me tomorrow if he could, and that he'd better go before they do it again, so he did.

And then so I went running around the house, and I was like, "I just spent half an hour on the phone with the most GORGEOUS man alive, and you two FREAKS just totally ruined it when we were just about to solve our problems!!!" But then I found them and they said sorry because Sarah tried to stop Stephanie from diong it, but she wouldn't listen. But then I was still happy because like he was gonna try and call me and he admitted that he still cared, which I know is hard for him to do, so I gotta give him props for that. Right? If ya'll got any advice or stuff about the whole Bek and Jordan thing, email me at redrose1345@hotmail.com, okay? Thanks ya'll!

Bek